05/23/12 What Would You Buy If You Had The Money?


Reading about the places Diana Frey used a credit card to buy things that would be paid for out of her Union’s funds; I got to daydreaming about what I would purchase if I could have an unlimited cash flow.

I’ve decided I’m quite boring! My list would be something like this:

Book Stores, an open-ended account to Amazon.com, Book Stores, a candle shop, an occasional movie, a store that sells Flair pens and Gel tip pens, Book Stores, possibly a few coffee shops, a tea shop, maybe a stone squirrel for my garden.

Hmmm, I sound greedy. There aren’t any gifts listed for my family. Let them get their own unlimited imaginary funds to plan lavish spending with!

At the end of the day, I suppose I’ll keep working and not dip into the company bank accounts. I have an awfully healthy fear of having to take showers with bunches of strange women in an open setting. 🙂

Have a blessed day!

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4/21/12 Life Isn’t Always BIG Moments


I remember beginning this blog, sitting at the dining room table just like I am today. Window open (to hear the birds) and hot coffee were my only requirements. That seems to be the case today! The thing with writing a blog, for me, is that I feel like I should have a BIG topic to write about. 

The only big things lately in my life have been doing my tax forms on April 15th and 16th. Surprisingly, we’re getting refunds. Not sure how that happened. I’m grateful. A little money is always a nice thing. Two or three years ago, I ended up owing an obscene amount of money (obscene to me, a drop in the bucket to Donald Trump). I did mystery shops during 2009. It clearly wasn’t for the money; or the taxes I’d pay later! The shops provided escape from pain and a bit of an adventure. There were some funny moments! In retrospect, I learned a lot about some unexpected things. That’s not so bad, at the end of the day.

Filing online is an option and touted as FREE, but only if you make under $2. a year, it seems. Life is funny; I’ll waste money on a lot of things, but tell me I have to pay to have someone else fill out my forms and that just tears it! I refuse to pay someone else to file my taxes. I’m a numbers addict. Love the thrill of making the numbers all come out right. I told you my life is pathetically not big!

I’m still in my friend Deb’s book club. We’ve read some brilliant books. The newest selection is “Icy Sparks“. I got the large print edition from the library this week (LOVE large print!) and I’ll let you know what I think.

I took a break from working with my elderly friends recently. One lament is that I only have so many hours in the day. My job, home life, sleeping, writing and reading consume most of my time. Craig bought lottery tickets to help us win early retirement. Alas, we didn’t win big and we’re both still working. 🙂 It’s spring time and I’ve signed to do a few birthday visits with Little Brother’s friends. Their Senior Prom is in May and I think that’s going to be a wonderful evening. Don’t laugh, but I never went to a prom in my life. How ironic: I finally get to go to a prom, but only because I’m escorting the elderly to their prom. Life throws you a chuckle every so often!

My son leaves for Andros Island in the Bahamas soon. For the first time in fifteen years, I’ll be without child for more than an over-nighter. What does a person do without kids in the house? My school never took us to the Bahamas. We thought it was a big deal to ride a bus with our French teacher Mrs. Malvitch (sorry, I can’t remember how to spell it and she’s probably not still around to correct me!) down to Florida for a few days during Spring Break.

Well, I must depart for now. In celebration of Earth Day, Garden Street Recycling is paying seventy cents a pound for aluminum cans. I have about ten bags to haul down. Recyling paid for most of Kevin’s trip to Andros and it’s time to start saving for next year’s trip!

Blessings and do something positive for the Earth this weekend!

12/10/11 “Celebration of Discipline”, “The Alchemist” and Other Musings


What a quiet, lovely morning I’m having. A good cup of coffee, candles scenting the air, Mavis the cat sitting on the windowsill doing her hourly patrol of the world in front of our house, sounds of the washing machine whirling away downstairs providing me with clean clothes for the day. Other than that, blessed silence. I so love the silence in the mornings, when you can think and talk to God about what’s going on in your world and ask Him what’s on His mind. In the last few weeks, when I’ve quieted down enough to listen for His voice, He’s given me the solution to some vexing problems, such simple solutions. All I had to do was listen. THAT’S the hard part, for me!

The book I am currently reading is “Celebration of Discipline“. That almost sounds like an oxymoron to my dysfunctional way of thinking. In my not always mature mind, freedom was celebration and freedom was all about rebellion and doing exactly what I wanted to do, without listening to any rules from anyone. In particular, this related to my eating. That celebration and rebellion has blown my body up to over 250 not very freeing pounds. It’s hard to jump for joy when you can’t lift your trunk off of the ground. I ran across an editorial cartoon a few years ago that mirrored the results of my dysfunctional view of freedom with my food and drink choices.

Choices can eventually catch up with you. 😦

 

That’s the reality I’m pondering now. I’m still dodging the diabetes bullet, the heart disease bullet, and to a lesser extent the blood pressure bullet. I think it’s just a matter of time before Fate’s aim hits my mark. The bullet that did find me is the labored breathing bullet. I used to take immense pride in my wonderful cardiovascular endurance, which was earned by regular exercise that I loved to do. Lately, I’ve been treating exercise like one of the seven deadly sins and have avoided it whenever possible. The result is running out of breath pretty much all the time. Even sitting at my desk can wind me. Now, THAT’S pathetic. Man, how the young, fit me would have laughed at the older, decrepit me; sure that THAT would never happen to her. It’s happened. 😦

Which brings me back to the book I’ve started to read. “Celebration of Discipline” by Richard Foster.

2011 has been a time of discovery and joyful realizations for me. Deciding to listen to the voice of God more. More importantly: FOLLOW what I believe God is telling me to do. I don’t always follow. Sometimes my pig-headed part woman part stubborn jackass side rears its head and says, “No”. Ever notice how when you do that, it rarely turns out well? Humans will be humans.

I’ve started tuning in and acting upon those leadings from God. Sometimes they come during my time of meditation and prayer, sometimes they come from a comment someone has said to me, sometimes they come from things I am reading. I believe God uses all sorts of messengers to get His message across to me.

Writing this blog, writing poetry, volunteering with the elderly, acting upon my mission of being the hands and feet of Jesus to the people I meet. These things have led to more promptings, quiet guidance, serenity, and a wish to keep going, to see what’s next.

I’ve read books this year which have all had an effect on me and my mission. “Emily Alone”, “Breakfast at Sally’s”, (I believe “Breakfast…”  Sally’s is a nickname for the Salvation Army, will alter your view of the homeless and your place in life.) “The Hunger Games“, “The Help”, and most recently, “The Alchemist“. I highly recommend all these books. If tapping into your spiritual journey is high on your list, then I would start with “The Alchemist”. If it resonates with you, you’re probably already tuning into your spiritual path. I found, upon finishing it, that it made me eager to find the next step on my path. I believe that’s “Celebration of Discipline”.

I think God knows how terrified I am by the thought of discipline. I’m 52, worn out, and the picture of a life not ruled by dietary discipline. My fear is that people will only see my failure and not even consider what I might have to say.

A few weeks ago, I was doing a search on the internet and, whatever I was looking for, the book “Celebration of Discipline” came up as one of the hits. I read the hit and it seemed interesting, but only attainable for “really mature spiritual people”, which I clearly do not consider myself. I’m growing, but still a wee lass. However, two days later, my minister Ryan mentioned this same book during the weekly message. Oh crap, I think God’s giving me one of those messages again. READ THIS BOOK. Really God? I’m not smart enough to understand this book. READ THIS BOOK. Seriously God, I’m a knucklehead, wouldn’t you rather someone more worthy read it? READ THIS BOOK. Alright already.

I started reading the book yesterday. It looks tough and deep and like I might actually learn something. That just gives me wobbly knees.

Can’t I just go on another diet and pretend life is fine?

READ THIS BOOK.

God can be SO persistent with the people He loves. 🙂

10/10/11 making tiME for ME


Poster (Time)

"TIME" Image by KTVee via Flickr

Good morning one and all! It’s been a busy few weeks. September is crazy busy with birthdays, anniversaries, Oktoberfest, LIFE….

October is the month I’m declaring that I’m important enough to devote some serious time to improving my health and giving me some spiritual and mental chill time. I don’t do this anymore. Maybe that’s why my body has landed in the state it’s in. I’m not sure what the state is called. Unkept, Let Go, Just Don’t Give A… any of those would fit. I’m moving to a new state, giving notice: I’m too important to live my life with one foot “in the grave” and the other foot in “I’m just too tired to care”.

October 1st, I began a health program recommended by a friend. The first 21 days are designed to ingrain some new mental and physical habits. I’ll report at the conclusion of the 21 days how I think it’s going. At this point I can report that I’m feeling better, lighter, a little more energetic and generally pretty happy with it.

I’ve also decided to work on my own recovery program. If you read this blog last month, you may have noted that my mind was so absorbed in my loved one’s life that I wasn’t giving a lot of effort to my own recovery. That’s never good or very productive at all. It’s kind of like when your car is stuck in some mud, instead of moving forward a bit to get out of the rut, you just spin those wheels harder and harder in place, determined that THAT will get you free. But it never does seem to, does it?

I may have mentioned the book “The Help” awhile back. I read it over the weekend. What a great book! Talk about keeping my stomach in knots and turning page after page to see what happens next! Our Book Club for “The Help” is next Monday, October 17th. What a lively discussion I’m anticipating. 🙂  I’ve waited to go see the movie until after I read the book, thankfully. To do it the other way around would have robbed me of so much of the tension I felt throughout the book. If anyone is interested in going to see the film this weekend, let me know.

Until next time, enjoy this weather and your countless blessings. :–)

Cheers!