08/28/13 I’m Still Alive – I Hope I Never Take That For Granted Again!!


Vin Diesel Riddick Standee 080813This is a post to tell myself and whoever’s reading this…. I don’t think I’ll take the saying about “appreciating today for tomorrow is not promised to me” for granted again.

August 8, 2013 I experienced what I thought was a heart attack, in all places, at a movie theatre, while I was doing a part time job of putting together a Vin Diesel “Riddick” standee. It would take a whole separate blog to adequately describe that night.

A heart attack, it wasn’t. Severe, massive Pulmonary Embolism saddle blood clot lodged in my lung with countless other little mutant clots riddled throughout my legs and lungs, it was. Forgive me for saying, “What the f**k?” to the doctor when he told me that. I don’t have blood clots, sir, you must have me confused with someone else. He didn’t. A stay in the i.c.u. for a few days followed by another few days on the 15th floor of the hospital gave me a lot of time to think about things.  There’s a part of me that’s still convinced this is all in my imagination, much like my favorite Robert Downey, Jr. daydreams…

but Denial only stretches so far. The part of me that can’t quite reconcile what I’ve been told about how many people ‘buy the farm’ when this happens, that part is still accepting that I’m alive for some purpose, I don’t really know what yet. It can’t just be to drive my family crazy! Maybe because there are still Robert Downey, Jr. films to be made and for me to watch! Maybe it’s some appointment with the divine and there are some things I need to do, I don’t know.

I’m still at home recovering, until these unnerving dizzy spells are under control. Part of me misses my job and coworkers like crazy. Part of me thinks I could get used to this lazy-piece-of-human-sitting-idly-watching-life-go-by gig. Not really, it’s driving me even squirrelier than I already am.

I have decided if I ever meet Vin Diesel, I will cheerfully tell him, “Son, you put me in the hospital!” I’m guessing he’s never heard THAT one before!

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